Top tips from a Senior Family Law Advocate on how to deal with your Child Custody matter in the Virginia Children’s Court

Family law legal matters can be very stressful. This is so whether you live in Virginia or any other city in South Africa. Especially so if you have no idea how the legal processes work. It is one thing to know that you are entitled to child support, but it is a totally different matter to know the law and procedure on how to claim child support. Luckily in child maintenance matters, the maintenance court is there to assist you in completing the application form. However, many times that is not enough. Especially so if the other parent has a lawyer and knows how to present the case for his or her client.

This article, however, deals with some top tips in care and contact or custody matters in the Children’s Court in Virginia. It would explain the processes involved and advise on how to be best prepared for your matter. This advice is applicable whether you live in Virginia or any other city in South Africa.

What to do before visiting the Virginia Children’s Court

Before you approach the Children’s Court in Virginia, first try to resolve the issues with the other parent. Therefore, if you want more contact with your child and the other parent is refusing, try to resolve the matter first with that parent. If that does not work, try mediation. The mediator can be anyone, from a trusted mutual friend, priest, or other religious leaders, or a professional like an attorney, psychologist, or the office of the Family Advocate. Virginia has many professionals that can assist you in this regard. If resolving the matter by yourselves is not possible, or mediation fails, then we suggest you approach the Virginia Children’s Court for assistance.

TIP: Focus on getting someone neutral to assist in mediating your matter. Organisations like FAMSA and FAMAC can be of assistance. Google them.

Approaching the Virginia Children’s Court

The Virginia Children’s Court should be approached if it is the closest Children’s Court to you. You need to verify with the Virginia Children’s Court that you fall under their area of jurisdiction. If not, they would direct you to which Children’s Court is applicable to you.

Once you arrive at the Virginia Children’s Court, they will provide you with a form headed “Bringing Matter to Court in Terms of Section 53 Children’s Act, 2005 (Act no. 38 of 2005) Regulation Relating to Children’s Court and International Child Abduction, 2008 [Regulation 6]. This form is also called Form 2.

In this form, you will provide all your particulars and that of the child or children and the other parent. The sections in the form are as follows:

PART A: PARTICULARS OF CHILD(REN)
PART B: PARTICULARS OF *CHILD WHO IS AFFECTED BY OR INVOLVED IN THE MATTER/PERSON *ACTING IN THE INTEREST OF THE CHILD/*ON BEHALF OF THE CHILD WHO CANNOT ACT IN HIS/HER OWN NAME/ *MEMBER OF A GROUP OF CLASS OF CHILDREN/*IN THE PUBLIC INTEREST (SECTION 53(2)
PART C: PARTICULARS OF PERSONS HAVING AN INTEREST IN THE MATTER
PART D: PARTICULARS OF MATTER

In part D, the following is stated which you need to provide in the form:

Nature of matter brought to Court: (Please give full details of the matter e.g., registration/amendment of parenting plans, removal of child to safe care, children in need of care and protection, placement in youth care centers, adoption etc.
Documents: Are there any documents relating to the matter? (If so please attach)

Once you have completed the form and attached the relevant documents to it, you must take it to a commissioner of Oaths to have it commissioned. It does not have to be in Virginia.

TIP: Draft a separate affidavit explaining your case. Outline some background information and reasons why the Court should give you what you request. Attach it to Form 2.

Processing your Application at the Virginia Children’s Court

Once you complete the Form A and submit it to the Clerk of the Virginia Children’s Court, they will process it and allocate it a case number or reference number. The Clerk of the Court would then allocate a date to the matter and advise the parties accordingly when the court date is. Please note that some courts follow a different process for processing the application and informing the parties of the court date. Please enquire from the Court when making the application what process they follow.

TIP: Obtain the contact details of the Court for you to contact them to obtain the Court date or other information. Ask for their contact number and email address.

Appearing in the Virginia Children’s Court

When notified of the Court date, both you and the other parent should attend. If you are making use of a lawyer (Advocate or Attorney), inform them timeously of the date. Depending on the Court, you may first see the Clerk or go directly to the Magistrate. The Children’s Court would do its best to try to resolve the matter. If the parents cannot come to an agreement, the Children’s Court may postpone the matter for either of the following:

Get a social worker involved in the matter;
Appoint a legal representative for the minor child;
Implement interim care and contact arrangements;
Having the parties attempt to agree on a parenting plan;

In serious matters, the Court may remove the minor child from both parents and place the child in foster care. The powers of the Children’s Court are extensive. It will, however, focus on what is in the child’s best interests.

TIP: Be as vocal as possible. Do not expect the Court to be understanding of your case or be on your side. It is your duty to explain your case and provide the Court with all the relevant information they require for them to make a fair decision.

Finalising the matter in the Virginia Children’s Court

Once the Virginia Children’s Court has enough information to make a final decision, it will do so. Depending on the facts of the matter, that could either be making a Parenting Plan, an Order of the Court or a final care and contact Order. The Court may even make further interim orders, where the parties are to return to Court after a few months, or a year later.

TIP: Do not agree to something just because the social worker, a lawyer, or the Court suggest it. You need to be happy with what is decided.

The above Virginia Children’s Court Application tips should apply to the following provinces and cities:

Eastern Cape:

Alice, Butterworth, East London, Graaff-Reinet, Grahamstown, King William’s Town, Mthatha

Port Elizabeth, Queenstown, Uitenhage, Zwelitsha

Free State:

Bethlehem. Bloemfontein, Jagersfontein, Kroonstad, Odendaalsrus, Parys, Phuthaditjhaba, Sasolburg, Virginia, Welkom

Gauteng:

Benoni, Boksburg, Brakpan, Carletonville, Germiston, Johannesburg, Krugersdorp, Pretoria, Randburg, Randfontein, Roodepoort, Soweto, Springs, Vanderbijlpark, Vereeniging

KwaZulu-Natal:

Durban, Empangeni, Ladysmith, Newcastle, Pietermaritzburg, Pinetown, Ulundi, Umlazi

Limpopo:

Giyani, Lebowakgomo, Musina, Phalaborwa, Polokwane, Seshego, Sibasa, Thabazimbi

Mpumalanga:

Emalahleni, Nelspruit, Secunda, North West, Klerksdorp, Mahikeng, Mmabatho, Potchefstroom, Rustenburg, Northern Cape, Kimberley, Kuruman, Port Nolloth

Western Cape:

Bellville, Virginia, Constantia, George, Hopefield, Oudtshoorn, Paarl, Simon’s Town, Stellenbosch, Swellendam, Worcester

Posted on 11 February 2025 by Telelaw

Top tips from a Senior Family Law Advocate on how to deal with your Child Custody matter in the Virginia Children’s Court

What to do before visiting the Virginia Children’s Court

TIP: Focus on getting someone neutral to assist in mediating your matter. Organisations like FAMSA and FAMAC can be of assistance. Google them.

Approaching the Virginia Children’s Court

In this form, you will provide all your particulars and that of the child or children and the other parent. The sections in the form are as follows:

PART A: PARTICULARS OF CHILD(REN)
PART B: PARTICULARS OF *CHILD WHO IS AFFECTED BY OR INVOLVED IN THE MATTER/PERSON *ACTING IN THE INTEREST OF THE CHILD/*ON BEHALF OF THE CHILD WHO CANNOT ACT IN HIS/HER OWN NAME/ *MEMBER OF A GROUP OF CLASS OF CHILDREN/*IN THE PUBLIC INTEREST (SECTION 53(2)
PART C: PARTICULARS OF PERSONS HAVING AN INTEREST IN THE MATTER
PART D: PARTICULARS OF MATTER

In part D, the following is stated which you need to provide in the form:

Nature of matter brought to Court: (Please give full details of the matter e.g., registration/amendment of parenting plans, removal of child to safe care, children in need of care and protection, placement in youth care centers, adoption etc.
Documents: Are there any documents relating to the matter? (If so please attach)

Once you have completed the form and attached the relevant documents to it, you must take it to a commissioner of Oaths to have it commissioned. It does not have to be in Virginia.

TIP: Draft a separate affidavit explaining your case. Outline some background information and reasons why the Court should give you what you request. Attach it to Form 2.

Processing your Application at the Virginia Children’s Court

TIP: Obtain the contact details of the Court for you to contact them to obtain the Court date or other information. Ask for their contact number and email address.

Appearing in the Virginia Children’s Court

Get a social worker involved in the matter;
Appoint a legal representative for the minor child;
Implement interim care and contact arrangements;
Having the parties attempt to agree on a parenting plan;

Finalising the matter in the Virginia Children’s Court

TIP: Do not agree to something just because the social worker, a lawyer, or the Court suggest it. You need to be happy with what is decided.

The above Virginia Children’s Court Application tips should apply to the following provinces and cities:

Eastern Cape:

Alice, Butterworth, East London, Graaff-Reinet, Grahamstown, King William’s Town, Mthatha

Port Elizabeth, Queenstown, Uitenhage, Zwelitsha

Free State:

Bethlehem. Bloemfontein, Jagersfontein, Kroonstad, Odendaalsrus, Parys, Phuthaditjhaba, Sasolburg, Virginia, Welkom

Gauteng:

Benoni, Boksburg, Brakpan, Carletonville, Germiston, Johannesburg, Krugersdorp, Pretoria, Randburg, Randfontein, Roodepoort, Soweto, Springs, Vanderbijlpark, Vereeniging

KwaZulu-Natal:

Durban, Empangeni, Ladysmith, Newcastle, Pietermaritzburg, Pinetown, Ulundi, Umlazi

Limpopo:

Giyani, Lebowakgomo, Musina, Phalaborwa, Polokwane, Seshego, Sibasa, Thabazimbi

Mpumalanga:

Emalahleni, Nelspruit, Secunda, North West, Klerksdorp, Mahikeng, Mmabatho, Potchefstroom, Rustenburg, Northern Cape, Kimberley, Kuruman, Port Nolloth

Western Cape:

Bellville, Virginia, Constantia, George, Hopefield, Oudtshoorn, Paarl, Simon’s Town, Stellenbosch, Swellendam, Worcester

Relocation with my minor child to the United States of America, New York (Consent and Refusal) – Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf The world is becoming a much smaller place, and technology plays a huge role. People are moving across the world for employment, love and happiness, something that was not the norm a few decades ago. There is no reason why you should remain in South Africa if you can find a better life for yourself and your family overseas. Moving overseas may provide you with the quality of life you want or the possibility of experiencing things you always wanted. Relocation of your minor child to New York, the United States of America If you are single and do not have any minor children, then moving around the world would not be too complicated. All you need to do is ensure that you have the necessary travel documentation and travel ticket (and spending money), and off you go. However, if you want to travel with your minor child or relocate to another country, things may not be that simple. Firstly, if there is another parent, and he or she has parental responsibilities and rights, then his or her consent is required. For example, let us say you live in Cape Town or Johannesburg, and you want to relocate to Miami or New York, the United States of America, you would require the other parent’s consent to leave South Africa with your minor child. This can cause challenges, especially if the staying parent does not agree to the relocation. What about Passport Consent to travel or relocate to New York, the United States of America? The same applies when it comes to your minor child applying for a South African passport to relocate to the United States of America, or any country. Both parents who have parental responsibilities and rights of guardianship will have to consent to the minor child’s passport application. In this regard, both parents have to be at the Department of Home Affairs when making the Application with the minor child. This can be challenging if you have a disinterested parent who does not want to co-operate with the passport application. What are the steps to follow when I want to relocate to New York, the United States of America with my minor child? To simplify the process for relocation, the first step would be to receive the other parent’s consent in principle for the relocation and that he or she will co-operate in this regard. Once that has been resolved, the parent relocating would need to make the appointment for the minor child’s passport application as well as the application for the relevant VISA. Each country has different requirements; however, seeing that it is a relocation, you need to apply for the correct VISA. For that, you need the Passport. Once the visa and travel arrangements have been finalised, the parent remaining behind will sign a parental consent letter for the international travel. That letter can be found on the Department of Home Affairs website. Basically, the parent remaining behind would state that he or she gives consent for the minor child to leave the Republic of South Africa. What can I do if the other parent does not want to consent to the minor child’s relocation to the United States of America? If the parent remaining in South Africa does not want to consent to the minor child’s passport application and/or his or her relocation to New York, the United States of America, then you would need to approach the Court. The Court, as upper guardian of the minor child, may order that the parent’s consent for the passport application and relocation be dispensed with. What this entails is submitting Court documents explaining why you want to relocate to New York, the United States of America. The other parent would also have an opportunity to give reasons why he or she objects. At the end of the process, the Court would determine what is in the minor child’s best interests. If it is in the minor child’s best interests to relocate, the Court would make it possible despite the issue of consent. What is the first step I should take if the other parent does not want to consent to the minor child’s passport application and/or relocation to New York, the United States of America? If the other parent does not want to consent to the passport application and/or the relocation of the minor child to New York, the United States of America – in that case, we suggest you approach an attorney or advocate (trust account) to assist you with the legal process. He or she would then contact the other parent explaining the reasons for the relocation and request the necessary consent. If the parent remaining in South Africa does still not agree to the passport application and/or to the relocation to New York, the United States of America, then the attorney or advocate will proceed to take the matter to court. The legal route can be expensive. However, it is necessarily to make the relocation of the minor child possible.

Posted on 11 February 2025 by Telelaw

Parents with Mental illnesses in child custody and care matters in South Africa
Biological parents are the ones who have parental responsibilities and rights over their children. Not grandparents, aunts, uncles and so on. Parental responsibilities and rights refer to caring, maintaining and acting as guardian for the child, to mention a few. Mothers automatically have parental responsibilities and rights of care, contact and guardianship, and fathers may either have it or acquire it. This depends on the facts of the case. The obligation to maintain your child however always applies.

Various factors are looked at when deciding what is best for a child

Having said the above, how parents exercise their parental responsibilities and rights would differ from case to case, especially if the parents are not living together. In such a case, various factors and circumstances will be looked at in determining what is best for the child. As would be seen later, in the case of a dispute in relation to how separated and divorced parents should exercise care and contact, expert advice needs to be considered. What this article deals with is how to resolve the issue of parental responsibilities and rights of care and contact when it comes to a parent having a mental illness or disease.

The child’s best interests in all matters concerning a child

We all want what is best for our children. That includes for them being cared for in the best possible way, either by you as a parent, or the other parent if that is best. Having parents who are mentally sound as caregivers are, therefore, an important aspect when it comes to raising a child. Logical and rational caring would take place under the circumstances. Parents would, therefore, communicate in a sensible way with the goal of caring for the child in the best possible way.

Mental illness in a parenting situation

If a couple lives together, and one of them has a mental illness, the other parent would be in a good position to care for the children and the other ill parent. However, problems arise when the parents are separated or no longer living together. The question is what happens to the child if one of the parents are mentally ill or have a mental disease or disorder? It must be stated that not all mental illnesses and diseases warrant consideration when it comes to the issue of care and contact in relation to minor children. If the mental illness or disease is adequately treated through medication and therapy, then it may not be a factor when it comes to parent’s parental responsibilities and rights of care and contact.

Types of mental illnesses and disorders

There are various types of mental illness and diseases. Some of the main groups of mental disorders are:

mood disorders (such as depression or bipolar disorder)
anxiety disorders
personality disorders
psychotic disorders (such as schizophrenia)
eating disorders
trauma-related disorders (such as post-traumatic stress disorder)
substance abuse disorders

Examples of signs and symptoms include:

Feeling sad or down
Confused thinking or reduced ability to concentrate
Excessive fears or worries, or extreme feelings of guilt
Extreme mood changes of highs and lows
Withdrawal from friends and activities
Significant tiredness, low energy or problems sleeping
Detachment from reality (delusions), paranoia or hallucinations
Inability to cope with daily problems or stress
Trouble understanding and relating to situations and to people
Problems with alcohol or drug use
Major changes in eating habits
Sex drive changes
Excessive anger, hostility or violence
Suicidal thinking

If any of the above-mentioned mental disorders and symptoms thereof would detrimentally affect a parent’s capability to care for a child; then it needs to be considered in a child custody matter. It could, therefore, happen that one parent who had custody over a child, loses it, due to developing or acquiring a mental illness.

How mental illness and diseases may manifest itself in child care and parenting situation

It may be that people with mental illnesses live normal lives as single individuals without any children. They would go to work, partake in sport, and socialize as any other person would. However, when children come into the picture, their mental illness could cause the following to occur:

The minor children are not cared for due to one parent having an obsessive-compulsive disorder of always washing his or her hands. They are therefore not fed on time, bathed nor care for properly;
A parent is violent and abusive towards the children. He may get angry very fast and act violently;
The parent is on strong medication which causes the parent to want to sleep all the time. The minor children are therefore not cared for at all and left to their own devices;
The parent lost all form of rationality and makes illogical decisions when it comes to the minor children, placing them in danger. For example, the parent may decide to take the minor children to walk with him or her to the shop late at night when it is dangerous to do so; and
The parent may suffer from hallucinations and live in a fantasy world. He or she may be guided on how to parent the minor children from “spirits” who visits and communicates with her.

Diagnoses of mental illness in a parent

It often happens that before a couple has a child, there are no apparent signs of mental illness. It may even happen that the parents of one of the parties knows of some underlying mental illness, but does not want to disclose it to the new person in their child’s life. In other cases, it is well known to all that there is a diagnosis of mental illness which is under control through medication, therapy and so on. And then there is the case where the person with the apparent mental illness does not want to seek any help or is in denial.

What happens after the child is born where one parent has a mental illness?

We are not medical doctors, psychologists, nor psychiatrists. However, in our experience, we noticed, in many of the cases we dealt with, that once a couple has a child, the mother’s medical illness surfaces, or becomes worse. The same may apply to the father. This observation could be because those types of matters make it to our office and should therefore not be a general assumption. However, be that as it may, if one parent has a medical illness that could affect her parenting skills, that needs to be looked at. This is so, even though it is not the parent’s fault that he or she has a mental illness. Now the best-case scenario would be for both parents to remain together if one has a mental disorder when there is a child involved. In that way, the child would be raised with both parents in his or her life and they can work as a team. Depending on the symptoms of the medical disorder, the family can live a balanced and fruitful life.

What happens to the child if the parents separate or divorces?

This is where the issues arise. Should the parents’ divorce or separate, the parties would have to decide who is best suited to care for the minor child or children. If the parent with the mental disorder was the primary caregiver of the minor child since birth, it would be hard to consider a change in primary caregiving. The parent with the mental illness may feel that it would be best that he or she care for the child, despite his or her mental condition. This is where things become very complicated and challenging. On the one hand, you have a parent who always cared for the child, but now has a mental illness, and want to retain primary care. On the other hand, you have a parent who was never the primary caregiver but now wants primary care due to the other parent’s mental condition.

Factors to be considered by the court and experts

Various factors come into play. For example, the age of the children, in whose home they will be living in, and also the mental condition itself. For example, if the child is 16 years old, and the mother has a serious mental illness, for the past 10 years, it would make little sense to change the primary residence of the minor child on that factor alone. By now the child would have learned to care for himself with the assistance the mother provided under the circumstances. On the other hand, if the child is 6 years old, and the mother cannot even take care of herself, then under those circumstances, it may be a good idea if the father primarily cares for the child after separation.

How does one resolve the issue of primary care if one of the parents have a mental condition?

Seeing that the condition is a medical one, mental health care experts need to get on board. An assessment would have to be made as to whether or not the child can be cared for by the relevant parent notwithstanding his or her mental condition. If there is no documentary proof, and such is required for court; the problem that one may encounter is that of doctor-patient confidentiality. This may not always be the case. But especially so if the parents were not married or living together. Usually, medical aid statements would give a timeline of the condition and its treatment. This would apply if the parent with the condition is on the other parent’s medical aid. If the medical practitioner is willing to give a report on the patient’s medical condition, and the inability to care for the minor child; things should be easier to resolve. However, if no such report or diagnosis is forthcoming, then things would be a bit more challenging. Either way, even if you have the report confirming the medical condition, and the issue is not resolved, then the court needs to be approached.

Approaching the court in a child custody matter where one parent has a mental illness

Not all cases of mental illness warrant a child being removed from the care of the primary caregiver. Each case is different and it depends on the facts of each one. However, should the mother had primary care, and she refuses to have the minor child reside with the father due to her mental condition, the court, unfortunately, have to be approached. If the father, in this case, has proof that the mother is mentally unsound and unable to care for the minor child, then the court would have to consider such evidence. This could be a report from the treating doctor or some medical records. The court may however not be in a position to decide how contact and care arrangements should be exercised. For this, the court may want the Office of the Family Advocate or a private social worker or psychologist to conduct an investigation and provide a report in the matter. Once the court has the expert report and heard from both parents concerned, would the court be in a favourable position to rule on what is best for the minor child? It does not mean that because the mother has a mental illness that she should not remain the primary caregiver. As outlined above, various factors would need to be considered. Especially the impact the mental illness would have on her caring ability towards the minor child.

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Posted on 11 February 2025 by Telelaw