Questions posted on Live Q and A with Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf

12 questions posed when registering on www.ourlawyer.co.za/live Question 1 Western Cape I have a restraining order against the mother of my child as she harasses myself and my family. I pay my maintenance however she refuses to let me see my son. It’s been almost a year now and I have reached out to social workers as well as mediation for a parenting plan but so far, no assistance – PLEASE HELP Question 2 Kwazulu Natal Divorced since 2013. Settlement agreement in place and through the years the maintenance amount stated on that agreement has changed. This year we relocated and my daughter was given the opportunity to live with her school principal in order to finish her Gr7 year in an excellent school. Her father notified me that he will not pay her maintenance to me because she is not in my care. He has not paid it to anyone else either. He gave her pocket money and paid the school fees which has always been separate from the maintenance amount. Please advise. Question 3 Western Cape My husband has been paying maintenance for 21 years. The child does not go to school and he has a garnish order that was supposed to stop in November 2021. He went to court for 2 days an filled the paperwork but the papers were still not delivered to the mother. Can you pls give advice as to how to stop the garnish order? Question 4 Eastern Cape I have a case with my baby’s dad. He doesn’t want to pay the amount. I went to the court and when they asked him how much he will afford. He said “I don’t know”. Now he said he wants the lawyer and he’s complaining that I’m not giving the child where’s he knows very well that in his house they always drunk and fighting with his wife and he demand that his wife is the one who supposed to buy my child’s clothes. My question is it a must? Question 5 Gauteng I need a brief summary of citizenship law democracy and the constitution module. With regards to you and your family. Question 6 Western Cape Hi. We have a parenting plan in place. Note that normal drop off on every alternate Sunday is at 5pm. With school holidays it’s supposed to be 50/50 so father picks up on Friday and drops the kids the following Friday. This past school holidays. Father decided the Sunday he can’t take the kids for his school week and with me pushing back. He ended up dropping kids at my workplace at 9pm on a Sunday night. Note that I was not at work and he then dropped the kids at my parent’s place at 10pm. What can I do? Question 7 Western Cape My husband left me and our baby when she was 4 months old and went overseas. Despite asking him a million times to pay maintenance he always says he doesn’t have money but is a sales director for a big hotel group in Dubai. He has not contributed a cent to our child and I recently lost my job. What is the process of getting him or forcing him legally to pay maintenance? Question 8 Western Cape Afternoon. My daughter passed away in Feb 2021. L my daughter and M were married. M was 5 and Z 5 days. M moved in with my sister where she looked after the children. After 6 months he moved in with his mom. Now we don’t see them often. I saw them last 5 November 2021 when a social worker contacted him where he told them not to speak to him but to his lawyer. He doesn’t want to meet with me and the social worker. I would love to see them once or twice a month but he refuses. Question 9 Gauteng What do we do when the father is being denied access to the child? The mother claims her family is the one controlling the situation. The grandmother of the child was the mediator the whole time and now she has passed away. What steps should we follow to make things right? Question 10 Gauteng After 22 years my husband left me for another woman. At the time he unlawfully evicted me. I didn’t know it was against the law then. I ended up giving notice as the lease was on my name just to get to my personal and the kids’ stuff. Yet he took everything. Emptied my business account. The car that was supposed to be registered in my company name he registered behind my back in his name. This all happened 2021. End of July he disappeared. Kept on telling me because I can’t give him the original marriage certificate, I’m delaying the process. I got a lawyer but after still no summons he ended up refunding me. My eldest turned 18 last year. She just got her matric results with 3 distinctions. My youngest is turning 18 in February this year. I manage to serve him for maintenance under rule 58. He basically took my clients because of his lies. I tried to get a job again in the industry I worked for years. However, he worked in the same industry. Due to his misconduct I lost my job again when the final MIE check came back. I have been unable to find a job since then. He supplied me with stock to continue with the few clients I had left. But it’s always on his terms. Leaving me basically with income when it suits him. My eldest daughter filed her own maintenance claim. As he now sees it as a privilege if he pays for her varsity. She got a full scholarship for high school because of academic and sport. She was deputy head. I managed to get the papers signed on him in a parking lot as none of us knows where he lives. After that I am completely without income. I have moved into a house close to varsity because of all the promises that was made. Now I’m stuck with even more bills. I have never denied him to see his kids yet he has seen them at most 5 hours. And then only in a mall. How do I ensure that he assist with the necessary? I have no income and the amount he pays depends on the day. I also applied for loans purely for business use. To increase stock. He took all the stock as well yet I’m now stuck with all the loans. Again. No fix income. Any advice that can help me be ready as I’m due in court on the 20th of Jan 2022. He strongly believes that he no longer needs to pay maintenance once they turn 18. As it is, he stopped the eldest pocket money as she is an adult now. Please any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you know he has the money. Question 11 Western Cape Maintenance order that I want to contest. As my ex-wife was working whilst we were married. Now that we are divorced for 3 and half years and I moved on she still living with my mother in a second dwelling as property is huge. When I got married last year September, she went ballistic as I’m not living there right now I make it my responsibility to get up at 6 am and go fetch in the morning for school when my ex leaves at 630 am or when she works from home I still do it. So i don’t have access to my child when it concerns my weekend with him. I’m blocked by him and her as his WhatsApp messages is link to her phone I have absolutely no rights in this settlement as I paid maintenance but cannot have access to my child knowing that she listening in on our conversation. This Christmas had no access she took him away with no consent as always even now never saw him since last year 23 December. Question 12 Gauteng Good day. The father of my children refuses to pay maintenance for December. I asked.

Posted on 11 February 2025 by Telelaw

Questions posted on Live Q and A with Advocate Muhammad Abduroaf

12 questions posed when registering on www.ourlawyer.co.za/live

Question 1

Western Cape

I have a restraining order against the mother of my child as she harasses myself and my family. I pay my maintenance however she refuses to let me see my son. It’s been almost a year now and I have reached out to social workers as well as mediation for a parenting plan but so far, no assistance – PLEASE HELP

Question 2

Kwazulu Natal

Divorced since 2013. Settlement agreement in place and through the years the maintenance amount stated on that agreement has changed. This year we relocated and my daughter was given the opportunity to live with her school principal in order to finish her Gr7 year in an excellent school. Her father notified me that he will not pay her maintenance to me because she is not in my care. He has not paid it to anyone else either. He gave her pocket money and paid the school fees which has always been separate from the maintenance amount. Please advise.

Question 3

Western Cape

My husband has been paying maintenance for 21 years. The child does not go to school and he has a garnish order that was supposed to stop in November 2021. He went to court for 2 days an filled the paperwork but the papers were still not delivered to the mother. Can you pls give advice as to how to stop the garnish order?

Question 4

Eastern Cape

I have a case with my baby’s dad. He doesn’t want to pay the amount. I went to the court and when they asked him how much he will afford. He said “I don’t know”. Now he said he wants the lawyer and he’s complaining that I’m not giving the child where’s he knows very well that in his house they always drunk and fighting with his wife and he demand that his wife is the one who supposed to buy my child’s clothes. My question is it a must?

Question 5

Gauteng

I need a brief summary of citizenship law democracy and the constitution module. With regards to you and your family.

Question 6

Western Cape

Hi. We have a parenting plan in place. Note that normal drop off on every alternate Sunday is at 5pm. With school holidays it’s supposed to be 50/50 so father picks up on Friday and drops the kids the following Friday. This past school holidays. Father decided the Sunday he can’t take the kids for his school week and with me pushing back. He ended up dropping kids at my workplace at 9pm on a Sunday night. Note that I was not at work and he then dropped the kids at my parent’s place at 10pm. What can I do?

Question 7

Western Cape

My husband left me and our baby when she was 4 months old and went overseas. Despite asking him a million times to pay maintenance he always says he doesn’t have money but is a sales director for a big hotel group in Dubai. He has not contributed a cent to our child and I recently lost my job. What is the process of getting him or forcing him legally to pay maintenance?

Question 8

Western Cape

Afternoon. My daughter passed away in Feb 2021. L my daughter and M were married. M was 5 and Z 5 days. M moved in with my sister where she looked after the children. After 6 months he moved in with his mom. Now we don’t see them often. I saw them last 5 November 2021 when a social worker contacted him where he told them not to speak to him but to his lawyer. He doesn’t want to meet with me and the social worker. I would love to see them once or twice a month but he refuses.

Question 9

Gauteng

What do we do when the father is being denied access to the child? The mother claims her family is the one controlling the situation. The grandmother of the child was the mediator the whole time and now she has passed away. What steps should we follow to make things right?

Question 10

Gauteng

After 22 years my husband left me for another woman. At the time he unlawfully evicted me. I didn’t know it was against the law then. I ended up giving notice as the lease was on my name just to get to my personal and the kids’ stuff. Yet he took everything. Emptied my business account. The car that was supposed to be registered in my company name he registered behind my back in his name. This all happened 2021. End of July he disappeared. Kept on telling me because I can’t give him the original marriage certificate, I’m delaying the process. I got a lawyer but after still no summons he ended up refunding me. My eldest turned 18 last year. She just got her matric results with 3 distinctions.

My youngest is turning 18 in February this year. I manage to serve him for maintenance under rule 58. He basically took my clients because of his lies. I tried to get a job again in the industry I worked for years. However, he worked in the same industry. Due to his misconduct I lost my job again when the final MIE check came back. I have been unable to find a job since then. He supplied me with stock to continue with the few clients I had left. But it’s always on his terms. Leaving me basically with income when it suits him. My eldest daughter filed her own maintenance claim. As he now sees it as a privilege if he pays for her varsity. She got a full scholarship for high school because of academic and sport. She was deputy head. I managed to get the papers signed on him in a parking lot as none of us knows where he lives. After that I am completely without income. I have moved into a house close to varsity because of all the promises that was made. Now I’m stuck with even more bills. I have never denied him to see his kids yet he has seen them at most 5 hours. And then only in a mall. How do I ensure that he assist with the necessary? I have no income and the amount he pays depends on the day. I also applied for loans purely for business use. To increase stock. He took all the stock as well yet I’m now stuck with all the loans. Again. No fix income. Any advice that can help me be ready as I’m due in court on the 20th of Jan 2022. He strongly believes that he no longer needs to pay maintenance once they turn 18. As it is, he stopped the eldest pocket money as she is an adult now. Please any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you know he has the money.

Question 11

Western Cape

Maintenance order that I want to contest. As my ex-wife was working whilst we were married. Now that we are divorced for 3 and half years and I moved on she still living with my mother in a second dwelling as property is huge. When I got married last year September, she went ballistic as I’m not living there right now I make it my responsibility to get up at 6 am and go fetch in the morning for school when my ex leaves at 630 am or when she works from home I still do it. So i don’t have access to my child when it concerns my weekend with him. I’m blocked by him and her as his WhatsApp messages is link to her phone I have absolutely no rights in this settlement as I paid maintenance but cannot have access to my child knowing that she listening in on our conversation. This Christmas had no access she took him away with no consent as always even now never saw him since last year 23 December.

Question 12

Gauteng

Good day. The father of my children refuses to pay maintenance for December. I asked.

[caption id="attachment_8911" align="alignleft" width="440"] Parental responsibilities and care during the coronavirus lockdown in South Africa[/caption]
Updated: 16 April 2020
New regulations have been issued on 16 April 2020. Click on the link below: The material change is that you do not have to have a court order or a parental responsibilities and rights agreement or parenting plan, registered with the family advocate. Possession of a birth certificate or certified copy of a birth certificate is now also allowed.

Update: 07 April 2020

NEW LOCKDOWN REGULATIONS REGARDING THE MOVEMENT OF CHILDREN – CERTAIN PARENTS MAY MOVE CHILDREN DURING THE NATIONAL LOCKDOWN PERIOD (7 April 2020)

What separated and divorced parents should think about prior to the coronavirus lockdown

With the world working towards eradicating the spreading of the coronavirus, South Africans are going to be placed on lockdown from 11:59 on Thursday 26 March 2020. This will endure for a period of 21 (twenty-one) days. This is what President Cyril Ramaphosa announced yesterday on national television. The applicable legislation allowing for this is the Disaster Management Act. This is done to contain the spread of the coronavirus in South Africa. What this means, in essence, unless you fall under the categories of persons allowed to work and be out there, you should remain at home.

The Application of Contact and care Court Orders during the lockdown

Schools have already been locked down and its keys stored away. The number of people who may be in the same place at the same time was restricted to an amount of 100. Now things have escalated to everyone staying at home unless you are allowed to be outside. This, however, leaves us with uncertain legal challenges when it comes to the exercising of contact and parental responsibilities and rights to minor children. It becomes even more challenging if there is a court order allowing a parent to have contact, but the child is currently with the other parent during the lockdown. • Does the court order supersede what the President told us to do? • Can we go against the lockdown injunction to exercise contact? At this moment, the questions are hard to answer. And in our view, should not be answered, unless clearer directives are provided by the government, dealing with this situation.

What are the usual contact and care arrangements?

The usual contact and care rights are any or a combination of the following: • The minor child will reside primarily with one parent for a period, and then with the other parent for the same period; • One parent has primary care with the child during the week, and the other parent has contact during alternative weekends; • The child resides with one parent, and the other parent collects the minor child in the morning and takes and collects the minor child from school. Thereafter returning the minor child to the primary caregiver; • Supervised contact, where a parent has contact at the minor child’s primary home, supervised by the other parent or another person; • Contact which is supervised in a public space, or by a social worker; and • Other specific cases. Contact would also entail telephonic and video contact.

How should contact be exercised during a lockdown?

There are 2 (two) more days before the lockdown. What happens to weekend contact? Some parents are exercising holiday contact at present. • What happens at the end of a specific parent’s holiday period? • Can a parent go and collect the child or children and have them now stay at a different parent? • And then return the children later, still during a lockdown? These and other questions are unprecedented, and direction is required from the government, not only lawyers. At the very least, parents should use the next two (2) days to decide where the children would primarily reside, and if indeed they can only live in one home for the 21 days, how contact can take place via other means. For example, WhatsApp video, FaceTime, Skype or Zoom.

Final words on parental contact during the lockdown

• Do not take the law into your own hands. • Until there is certainty on this issue, presume that the child would need to remain with one parent during this period. • Arrange for alternative forms of contact as suggested above. • Also, ensure that the child has enough clothes and necessities at the home he or she will reside during the lockdown. • Use the next two (2) days to prepare for the worst, so that your child would have the best.